Even the best relationships and loves can fall apart. When your marriage is over, you might wish to walk away and never see or hear from your ex again. If you have children together, this is becoming increasingly difficult because parents are strongly encouraged to work with each other as civil ex-spouses with children in common. When you learn a new way to look at your ex, communicate with them and be in the same place, life is good. Your children will thank you when they are older.
Learning to talk to your ex-spouse without your attorney
During your divorce you may not exchange any communications with your soon to be ex-spouse because everything is going through your attorney, like a family law attorney Plano TX trusts. After the divorce, however, you might be on your own without a personal representative. How can you talk to someone you dislike or distrust enough to divorce them?
Technology paves the way for forms of communication that are less personal and might feel more comfortable to people who do not want to talk to one another. To discuss weekend drop offs, changes in visitation, and expenses for children, you might use text messages or some of the new co-parenting apps and websites designed for your situation. If you are using technology, you may elect a format such as emails or the sites that allow you to keep a record of conversations in case you need them later.
Keeping a smile on your face is tough but your children will appreciate it
As you accept your new reality, think of your ex-spouse as a new version of the person, the post-divorce version. Even if you must play a game in your head, tell yourself the post-divorce version of your ex poses no threat and is someone you must talk to whether you like it or not. Like you would be civil to a coworker, learn to be civil with your ex.
At some point you will encounter a situation that might make you uncomfortable, such as a sporting event where you and your ex will both be in the stands. Imagine your child is on the basketball court and can see both you and the other parent are there, and know at that moment all that matters is you are both there. After the game you might wait around to chat with your child. Your ex may be on the other end of the bleachers also waiting to say hello to their son or daughter. Keep a smile on your face and if your ex is there with a new significant other, wear a much bigger smile until you make it to the car or back home so you can relax.
Thanks to our friends and contributors from Scroggins Family Law for their insight into co-parenting and family law practice.